There are now two types of people on Redstone: those who take out their own trash and those who don’t. That’s a familiar story isn’t it? If you look hard enough, just about everything can be reduced into an us-vs.-them scenario.

This one has a few of levels though. There are the fancy people who still get their trash emptied regularly and who are probably unaware that this is even a thing.

Then there are the people who work at the Garrison who think they’re clever and dump their trash in the common areas making it “someone else’s problem.”

And, finally, you have the people who are acting like adults and handling their business.

If you’re one of the fancy people who still has their trash magically disappear every week, I’m not really talking to you. I hope you appreciate what you have. It’s not your fault you’ve been so blessed, but that doesn’t stop some from being a little salty anyway. Nevertheless, I’ll try to point my vitriol in the right direction.

Specifically, I’m looking right at whomever is piling trash up in the common area outside of D-101 and D-105, because that someone else referenced above is probably going to become me in the not too distant future.

We use those rooms regularly. And, no I’m not the one trying to be clever, despite being asked on a number of occasions.

I feel like Shaggy in 2000. It wasn’t me.

I actually bus my trash out to the big bin every week.

So, what type of person leaves messes for other people to clean up? Glad you asked. I have me ideas.

These are probably the same people who now have a surplus of gasoline to go along with their pile of toilet paper left over from 2020, because they’re obviously smarter than everyone else.

I would also venture a guess that these folks are the ones not wearing a mask even though we’re still under a DOD mandate to wear a mask, because the rules clearly don’t apply to them.

And, I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t reside in their mother’s basement and are over the age of 35, because “hey man, it’s free rent. I don’t have to do laundry, and I expect others to take care of me because I can’t take care of myself.”

There’s part of me that understands where these folks are coming from. I didn’t expect to have custodial duties added on to my job description either, but I’ve done it at every place I’ve ever worked.

What should we do about the people who won’t take responsibility for their own trash? Glad you asked. I’ve got

an idea.

I say we take a tiered approach. The first offense is trash duty for the entire building for two weeks. The second offense is trash duty for a month. And, if they still haven’t figured it out and there’s a third time, then we just move the bin into their office and have everyone else dump their trash in there for the rest of the year.

Sure. That seems a little draconian, and I’m sure there are some rules that prevent it, but there’s a starting point.

Maybe it’s a little early to take such drastic actions, because any time there’s a change, it takes a minute to figure out how it’s going to work in the real world and work out the hiccups.

I don’t mind taking out my own trash or doing a little vacuuming, or cleaning up the bathroom a little bit, but for the love of all that’s holy can I please get some paper towels to put in the men’s bathroom on the second floor?

I always forget that the bathroom is out of paper towels. It’s a problem.

I’m well aware that I resemble the personification of Eeyore traipsing around the halls, but now Eeyore. Is. Dripping.

Are there other channels to make that request? Probably. But, like my wife always tells me, I don’t suffer in silence well.

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