Remember when you were little, and your parents plopped down some culinary atrocity on your plate and made you sit there until you ate every bite?
That’s what I want to do to all these people who are panic buying meat, eggs and milk.
I want to make sure they eat every ounce of meat, drink every drop of milk, and crack and devour every egg they bought.
It doesn’t make any sense.
Here’s why: Most of your milk, eggs and meat are produced in the U.S. I say most because there’s always that one guy who orders specialty versions of those products that are shipped in from who knows where. That guy might have a problem, and I don’t really care, but for the rest of us, there’s plenty to go around.
Our food supply chain is fine.
The problem is people buying two to four times as much food as they need.
If it weren’t for social distancing, I’d say we all line up and yell “shame” at them as they stand in line or maybe when all the food they bought rots we march them down the street and throw it at them like Game of Thrones’ “walk of atonement.”
Maybe I’m being harsh. I’m sure these hoarders are not bad people, and they just think they’re being prepared.
They’re wrong, but I do understand why they think that.
When the major tornado outbreak tore through North Alabama and knocked out power for a couple of weeks in 2011, I was caught off guard.
I have certain habits like always keeping my gas tank at least half full, but I’m definitely not what you would call a prepper.
None of my habits changed because of 2011, but my dad’s did.
My dad and I are alike in that when we get into something, we go full-bore until we get bored. So, dad went into full prepper mode once everything got back to normal. The UPS guy wore a path out in his front yard because of all the stuff he ordered off of Amazon.
Fast forward to last week when I needed toilet paper. I was not concerned because I knew dad had two shelves of the stuff in his garage.
Now, dad can be stingy, but when it came down to me using the facilities at his house any time I needed to and giving me a few rolls of toilet paper until the crazy died down, he gladly handed over plenty of TP.
Dad’s not a big people person, and he doesn’t like people in his space.
Some of you may be thinking it’s awfully hypocritical of me to bash people buying extravagant amounts of stuff while I’m benefiting from someone with a cache of paper goods, food, water and Lord knows what else.
The difference is dad’s stash wasn’t built in a day. It’s been built since 2011. He didn’t go to Costco and buy 30 packs of toilet paper or 100 pounds of chicken at once. He just bought a little extra here or there.
And, even now, if everyone just bought a little extra instead of going crazy, you still wouldn’t notice a difference in the supply at your favorite grocery store.
So, buy what you need, but leave some for whoever comes next.
Things have to get much worse for us to really run out.